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“Asher, I….” she began.
He pressed his fingers to her mouth. “Don’t say anything, Kimberly. You don’t have to”
“Yes, I do” Kimberly said. “You saved me… Again. Not just from Christopher. But you showed me that I was tough and capable”
“You always knew that. You always have been” Asher replied.
“Maybe, but I never had to prove it before” She shrugged. “I shot you”
“Good for you. You did what you had to in order to survive.. To save your father”
“Oh right. I ran straight to the enemy”
“You didn’t know that. The point is you needed to escape from me and you did” he said.
His casual acceptance of her actions made her heart sick. “I should have trusted you”
“We have been over that” he leaned close and kissed her forehead. “The reality of all this is you haven’t even known me for long. In a dangerous situation, everything is heightened. Senses, reality, feelings. But in time you go back to your regular life and you reevaluate what happened. You have a lot to be proud of. You were tough from start to finish. You never gave up. Hold on to that”
“Nice words” she said as her stomach tensed. “It sounds a lot like a goodbye speech”
“It is” he said.
Pain slammed into her. “But you can’t. We have been through so much. It has to mean something” I have to mean something. But she couldn’t bring herself to say that.
“Of course it does” he told her. “You are amazing and I will never forget you”
“But?” she asked.
“But this isn’t real. You are reacting to the danger”
Great. Now he was telling her she didn’t know her own heart? “What? You are saying this is like Stockholm syndrome? That I have fallen for you because of what we have been through?
He nodded.”I know that seems cruel, but in time you will see that I’m right. You need to get back to your own life. See your friends get back to work, establish a routine. I’m not saying you will forget me completely but in six months, I won’t matter the same way. If we were to start something now, you would quickly regret it but you would feel too guilty to tell me ”
“You are wrong” she said.”You are completely wrong”
“You can’t know how much I want to be. I have seen it happen” he said.
“It doesn’t mean it will work out the same way with us”
“It might as well be,” he replied.
As he spoke, she saw the pain flash through his eyes. She reacted instinctively, reaching out for him. He hesitated at first, then he gathered her close and pressed his mouth to hers.
It was a kiss of desperation, of one last time before they were apart forever. She clung to him, hoping to convince him with her mouth and her body that this was the most real relationship she had ever been in. She strained to get closer, to crawl inside of him. Tears spilled from her eyes.
“I love you” she whispered when he drew back. “Why can’t you believe me?” she asked.
“Don’t cry” he said, brushing her cheeks with his thumbs. “I’m not worth it”
“Of course you are,” she said.
He lingered against her ear. “I want you to be happy. Live your life”
She couldn’t stop crying. Sobs built up in her chest, although she refused to give in to them.
“Did you hear me?” she demanded. “I love you”
He bent down and kissed her. “You have touched me in ways I would never have thought possible” he said.
Damn the man. He wasn’t even going to acknowledge her feelings. “What happens if I feel the same way In six months?” she asked.
“You won’t” he said.
“But if I do?”
“Goodbye, Kimberly”
“Asher. No!”
The sobs claimed her and she couldn’t speak. She had the sense of being alone, so very alone. Then someone was with her, but the arm that offered support wasn’t familiar, and when she was finally able to see, the eyes that watched her were pale and empty.
“He is gone,” James told her.
She nodded and tried to pull herself together. She still had to face her father and help him make sense of all that had happened. She still had a life.
But she didn’t want any of it. Not without Asher.
“Is it because I didn’t trust him?” she asked James.
James shook his head. “No. He understands that. Any of us would have reacted the same way” he said.
“Then why?”
“It’s like going on vacation. You want to stay in your beach front bungalow forever, but it’s not real life. At some point you have to get back to the plane and go home”
“Asher is my home.” she said. “But he won’t believe that”
James stared at her for a long time. Finally he reached into his jeans back pocket and pulled out a business card. There was nothing on it but a phone number.
“Six months,” he said. “If you still feel the same way about him, then you call this number.Belonging © NôvelDram/a.Org.
Six months. It felt like a lifetime but having a way to get in touch with Asher gave her hope.
“You will see,” she said.
James didn’t look convinced. “Now come on, dollface. Let’s get you home”
———————–
Kimberly slept for nearly twenty four hours. When she awoke, she was in the bedroom where she had grown up. Surrounded by stuffed animals and school awards.
It was nearly evening, still light, and she had the sense of having gone so far, she might never find her way back.
After showering and dressing, she made her way downstairs. She found her father in his study. But Instead of sitting behind his desk, engrossed in papers, he sat in a leather club chair, a drink in his hand. When he saw her, he put down the glass, stood and walked over to her.
“Kimberly” he said before pulling her into his arms and hugging her.
“I’m so sorry” he said, echoing what she had said to Asher. “I spent most of last night with the police and federal agents, then had another round with them this morning. The things they told me. The things Christopher did”