# 2 — Chapter 19
Arabella
The look on Carmelo’s face as he caught Gaetano and I making out in the hot tub will haunt me for a lifetime. The hurt and pain in his expression, the sadness in his eyes was enough for me to want to run after him.
But I couldn’t.
I have to endure every kiss placed on my body, every groping touch of his hands on my ass and breast. No longer is there lust and heat between us. The only thing present in my mind is what I’m going to say to Carmelo when Gaetano is through with me. It’s the only thing I can concentrate on.
The worst case scenario flashes into my mind, the thought of him returning to Chicago and leaving me here unprotected. He’s my best friend, my comfort, a piece of my home, I’d be deceased if he left. God, how I want to push Gaetano away and run after Carmelo.
“It’s getting late,” my voice comes out shaky.
“I could spend all night doing this to you, Bella,” he continues his ministrations of sucking on the sensitive skin of my throat.
“I’m getting tired,” I try to pull back. When we come face-to-face after minutes of him buried in my neck, I see he looks pissed. I give him a pouty look. “We can always continue this tomorrow,” I use a flirtatious tone. “I’m going to need my beauty rest to keep up with you,” I trail my index finger along his sharp jawline.
That causes him to smile. “Yes, you will. Besides, I think we’re getting pruney,” he holds up his wrinkled fingertips.
Gaetano kisses my forehead and climbs out of the hot tub. I watch his back muscles as he walks over to the lounge chair I was previously tanning in, to grab my towel. He holds it open and walks back toward me waiting for me to get out and dry off in his arms.
I let him kiss me farewell and as soon as he is out of sight, I run like a madwoman to Carmelo’s room. I’m still soaking wet in my towel and the air conditioning in the house causes me to start to shiver. Without knocking I go for his doorknob to open his door, but it’s locked. I knock on it as quietly as I can.
“Carmelo, please let me in,” I whisper.
No answer.
“Please. Please, it’s not what it looked like. I can explain everything,” I beg.
It takes him a couple of minutes before he gives in and unlocks the door. He doesn’t open it for me, which tells me he must be royally pissed-but ready to hear me out. I open the door and find his back to the door as he’s staring out the window. I notice a drink in his hand.
“Are you drunk?” I ask softly before closing the door behind me and locking us both inside.
“No,” he voice is deep and rough. “I was planning on it.”
“And what stopped you?”This content provided by N(o)velDrama].[Org.
“You, knocking on my door,” he still hasn’t turned around to look at me.
“Please let me explain,” I creep towards him.
He turns around violently causing me to jump in surprise. He snaps at me yelling, “Are you just playing me? Using me? I mean if you have him then what has been the point of scratching each other’s itches? I-I’ve been trying to wrap my head around things and I just can’t come up with a logical explanation.”
“What are you talking about?” I blink a few times trying to comprehend all his questions.
He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “Have you been with other guys while you’ve been with me?”
“No! No, of course not. We agreed that-”
“I know what we agreed on. You seem to need a refresher seeing as you just broke your promise,” his jaw ticks with annoyance and frustration.
“We never had sex, you have been the only one since Luca that I’ve had sex with. Carmelo, will you please calm down so I can explain!” I cry out.
“Do you love him?”
My eyes widen. “God, no!”
“Then why?” His voice cracks.
“He’s my fiancé,” I frown.
He freezes in place. “What?”
“It’s the reason Lazzaro wanted me here. It seems I’ve been placed in another arranged marriage.”
Carmelo can’t even look me in the eyes anymore. His vision goes to the floor and sits on the edge of his bed as if he can’t trust his balance anymore. “You’re getting married?”
I nod my head not trust my voice to speak for me. There’s a flicker of wistfulness in my eyes.
“When?”
“I don’t know,” I shrug my shoulders. For the first time, in a long time, I start to cry. My shoulders shake uncontrollably and my body begins to tremble. “I’m scared, Carmelo. I’m so scared.”
He rushes off his bed to wrap his arms around me and hold me. I’m crushed by his body, but I don’t care. I plant my face into his chest inhaling his scent and finding comfort in his embrace.
“What’s going on?” He asks in a soft whisper.
“He’s going to kill me,” I sob, “He’s crazy, I watched him shoot his butler for interrupting about a phone call and breaking a vase a-and he’s threatened Lazzaro before. He will kill anyone who lies to him and I’ve lied to him!” I begin to hyperventilate.
Carmelo grips my shoulders and bends down so he is eye-level with me. He shushes me like he would a newborn. His face radiates with sympathy and compassion. His eyes are begging me to spill my secrets and tell him everything. “You know I am here to protect you. I won’t let him harm you. I promise,” he reassured me. “Now, tell me everything. What did you lie to him about?”
“He…” I take a deep breath. I can do this. I can tell him. But what if it ruins my relationship with Carmelo forever? “He wants to get married because he wants children.”
“And?” Carmelo waits for the rest.
“And I can’t give him any,” my hands shake with fear and despair. “I’m infertile.”
He doesn’t even flinch or react. It’s as though I hadn’t just dropped a bomb of news on him. “He thinks you can have children? Did you tell him you could?”
I shake my head, “Laz promised him I was fruitful and I didn’t lie to him, but I’ve been withholding the truth. Omitting is still lying and he’ll kill me!”
“I won’t let him do that, Arabella,” his thumbs rub across my shoulders.
“He’s crazy! If for one second he thinks you’re against him or if you even look at me a certain way, he will kill you.” Tears pool out of my eyes and streak down my cheeks.
“Hey,” he says softly catching my gaze. “I can take care of myself, don’t worry about me. I made a promise and I will figure something out.”
“There’s no way out,” I shake my head. “I don’t want to be trapped in another marriage!”
Carmelo embraces me holding my head against his chest and rocking us back and forth. He shushes me with a soothing tone that helps me calm down. He lifts me in his arms and takes us to his bed. He lays down on his back and I lay on top of him. His arms are still wrapped around me and continue to hold me tight. His hands stroke my back, warming and relaxing me. I bury my face in the juncture where his neck and shoulder meet.
After my sobs have stopped and my breathing has once again regulated, I pull back from Carmelo’s body to look at his eyes. He stares back at me and the kindness and sympathy in his gaze make me lean in and brush a kiss against his soft lips. He kisses me back and it is unhurried unlike all the other times. Our kisses have always been quick to turn into hot make-out sessions, but this is different. This is comfort and our lips simulating what we would do if we were both madly in love with each other.
I wrap my arms around his neck and straddle his lap as we keep our lips pressed together and bask in what we give each other. The slow pace is nice and the simple kissing makes me feel like a young school girl again, but like always-things escalate. I grind myself against the erection straining in his jeans.
“Make me forget,” I whisper breathlessly against his ear. My breath caressing the shell of his ear causing him to groan and grip my hips tighter.
He doesn’t respond but obliges by undoing the tie of my bathing suit and exposing my breasts. My nipples are taut and Carmelo knows just what to do. He places his mouth around one of my nipples and sucks. My hands dive into his hair pulling and guiding him. Pleasure shoots down between my legs and my hips grind faster on his lap.
I start to grow impatient and tug his shirt above his head. I marvel at his strong muscles and the tattoos along his arms and on his chest. He lifts me slightly off his lap so he can yank down my bottoms, leaving me naked before him. Usually I enjoy asserting my dominance and being on top, but it’s not something I want to do right now. I crawl off of him and lay down on my back.
Carmelo stands and unbuckles his jeans. I stare in anticipation nearly licking my lips. I’ve seen him naked so many times before, but for some reason I’m most excited for this. I look at his body with a new appreciation and my heart twists into a knot at this adoration I’m beginning to feel. He pulls his boxers down with his jeans and stands at attention. My mouth waters, out of all the men I’ve took to bed, he’s the biggest.
Carmelo positions himself between my legs and hovers above me. We’re both breathing hard even though we haven’t done anything yet. My chest rises and falls rapidly and I close my eyes finding myself too overwhelmed. He touched my cheek and I open them to find him smiling at me. He brushes his thumb across my face to catch and wipe away a tear falling from my eye.
We look at each other when he enters me. We both groan when he comes to a hilt and yet we continue to stare. There’s no closing our eyes and imaging anything else, there’s no fast, hard, race to the finish line, it’s just Carmelo and I. Our mouths are parted slightly as he slowly pushes in and out, the sensations feel a hundred times more sensitive and pleasurable this way. Our staring makes my heart skip a beat and even when my eyes flutter shut as my orgasm builds, I still force them open to watch Carmelo.
Watching him makes the entire experience feel erotic. His muscles straining as he works his body over me. The sweat beading at his forehead, his dark eyes dilated, his soft pants and occasional grunts… it’s like watching a work of art.
“Arabella,” he whispers my name in the most beautiful way.
“Carmelo,” I moan.
My arms wrap around his back and I pull him down until our bodies are flush against each other. I hug him to me and his mouth next to my ear, whispering sweet little nothings that make my release so dangerously close to the edge. I don’t want this to end, at least not this quickly. I bite his earlobe gently and slide my hands down until I grab his ass and pull him deeper inside me.
The time for slow and steady comes to end when we can no longer starve our releases. Carmelo’s speed picks up and his rhythm becomes more jerky as thrusts inside of me. I pant against his ear and only when his hand comes between us and he massages my sweet spot in slow circles, I shiver through perfect nirvana. My release barrels down my spine and I cry out, convulsing with ecstasy. I can’t stop moaning, not even when Carmelo spills himself inside of me. My entire body feels hypersensitive and there’s not enough oxygen left in the room to keep me breathing.
Carmelo pulls himself out of me and lays beside me on his back. We both look at the ceiling and the sounds of heavy breathing fills the silent room. The sweat on my body cools me after a handful of minutes and I curl up to share Carmelo’s body heat to warm me.
“That was…” Carmelo trails.
“Yeah,” I finish.
Reality hits me and I start to think of Gaetano again. That’s when I start to realize I’m not ready to let this go. I’m not ready to stop fooling around with Carmelo. I’m not ready to give my body to another. But I’m still not ready to admit what I just felt during our… session.
Love making, the words echo in my head from somewhere in the depths of my mind.
Carmelo’s breathing evens out and I look up to find his eyes closed. I sneak out while he’s asleep. I put my bikini back on and wrap myself in the damp beach towel I pick up from across his floor. Checking to see if there’s no one in the hallway, I tiptoe back to my own room to shower and think of how the hell did I get myself in this situation.