Sould As The Alpha King's Breeder

90  Chapter 90 I didn’t Open The Window…

Soren was right on time with a big bouquet of beautiful purple lilacs. “There she is!” he said when I opened the door. “Man, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes!” He kissed my cheek, and I hugged him, thanking him for the flowers.

We had a lovely dinner together, but I was distracted, and I knew he could tell.

I did my best to stay tuned in to what he was saying, and he did his best to entertain me. I laughed at his jokes and smiled at his stories– but I saw in his eyes that he sensed something was different.

“This is the best apple pie I’ve ever tasted,” Soren said as he took a bite.

“I’m glad you like it,” I said, poking around at my own piece.

“Did you use crab apples to make it?” he asked me.

I looked at him for a second, and then he started laughing.

“I’m just teasing, Ro. Maybe it’s because you’re getting further along in your pregnancy. I bet you’re not sleeping well, are you?”

“No, I’m not,” I told him. “I’m actually really tired.”

“Well, let me finish my pie, and I’ll go,” he said.

“I’m sorry. I don’t want to rush you. I’ve been looking forward to seeing you.”

He reached across the table and squeezed my hand.

“Me too.”

This time, I didn’t see the usual smile on his face. That made me nervous.

I pulled my hand back, and then realized that I was acting quite awkwardly. Luckily, Soren didn’t seem to think much of it, and gracefully finished his apple pie.

A few minutes later, I walked him to the door. He kissed my cheek goodbye, and I immediately turned off all of the lights to go to bed.

I was not going out to the garden that night. I was not going to look for Ethan or wait to see if he was going to show up.

This was my life now, and this was what I needed to focus on.

With that resolve, I got into bed and slept more peacefully than I had in a very long time.

In the morning, I got up and went about my normal routine. I felt more focused than I had the day before, but Ethan was still on my mind.

Had he come by to see if the window was open? If he had seen it closed, how had that made him feel? Was he upset, or did he just shrug it off and head back to the docks to depart?

Trying not to dwell on it, I decided to go out to work in the garden for a bit– not because I was looking for footprints or any evidence that Ethan had been there, but because I hadn’t had a chance to work on the flowerbeds in a few days, and several of them needed trimming.

I walked outside… and stopped in my tracks.

Lying on the ground near the spot where I’d spoken to Ethan was a familiar flower.

It was one that only grew in the Drogomar pack lands, right outside the Luna suite.

I stared at it from a distance, not sure it was real– and then, when I was sure that it was, not sure what to do.

Finally, I went over and picked it up, looking around for Ethan.

But he wasn’t there.

I held the petals to my nose and took a whiff, inhaling the sweet floral fragrance.

It reminded me of being with him. Not of all of the difficult times, but of the times that I was in his arms, when I felt loved and cared for.

Part of me wanted to scold him– he certainly knew how to drive me crazy.

I put the flower in the pocket of my gardening apron and went about my chores.

For the next two days, I played the same game with myself, torturing my own mind over whether or not to leave the window open. Each morning, I went out to find a flower waiting for me.

Why was he leaving them?

I didn’t know.

Perhaps I should ask him…

No! I couldn’t do that.

That evening, Soren came for dinner. I was so distracted that I was, doubtless, the worst hostess in the history of hostesses.

“Did you get any gardening done today?” he asked me.

“Some,” I said, cutting into my steak.

He cleared his throat, obviously wanting more of an answer. “What about the piano? Did you play anything today?”

“A few songs,” I mumbled, cutting another piece off and putting it in my mouth.

“Did you ride any elephants around the yard?”

“No, I– ” I looked up at him, and he had an amused smirk on his face. I slowly shook my head and chuckled. “No, I didn’t ride any elephants around the yard.”

“I was just seeing if you were listening,” he said with a shrug.

“I’m sorry,” I said, not for the first time. “I’m just thinking about the baby so much these days. I’m so ready to meet them.”

“I understand.” He patted my hand. “Do you want me to stay with you for a while after dinner? We can just sit and keep one another company.”

I thought about his offer and decided that might be nice. I still didn’t think that I was going to go out and look for Ethan that night.

But I didn’t know. I was torn. He didn’t seem to be giving up on me.

And I didn’t understand why.

After dinner was over, Soren and I moved into the living room. I didn’t play the piano this time. We just sat on the couch for a bit, talking about nothing much. He told me about his latest trip, and I tried to focus the best I could.

Eventually, I started yawning.

“I guess I should let you get some sleep,” he said. “Do you want me to sleep on the couch?”

The idea of Ethan seeing him sleep here had me wide awake.

“Oh, uh, no thank you,” I said. “I’ll be fine. But thanks.”

Soren looked reluctant, but he got up, and I walked him to the door. He hugged me goodbye, and when he kissed my cheek, his warm lips lingered. It wasn’t unwelcome; I didn’t push him away. NôvelDrama.Org (C) content.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said.

I smiled at him. “See you tomorrow.”

Once Soren was gone, I went back inside and sat on the couch for a moment, but I knew what I had to do.

This needed to end.

With a deep breath, I went outside.

It was a balmy evening, and the moon was obscured by clouds. I walked over to the place where I’d spoken to him the other night.

“Ethan?” I whispered. “If you’re here, come out and meet me.” This time, I vowed not to turn around and run into him.

It only took a moment for him to appear.

I stood in awe of him, of how handsome he looked, even in the dim light the stars cast through the clouds. He stood next to the rose bushes, their large, crimson blooms seeming to frame him like a prince in a fairy tale romance. The sea breeze stirred the flowers, bringing the scent of roses to me in the night air.

His blue eyes were locked on me. I was tempted to run into his muscular arms and bury my head in his chest. I thought of all of the happy moments we’d spent together. I wanted to be back there with him again and forget all of the resentment I held toward him.

But I had to be strong.

“Rosalie,” he said. “You came.”

He smiled at me like he thought I was there to tell him I wanted to give him another try.

“I did come,” I said, trying to keep my tone even. “But only to tell you… you should go. It’s not safe here. Go back to the capital where you belong.”

“But the window,” he said, looking over his shoulder. “You left it open, but you never came.”

“If it was left open, it wasn’t me.” It must have been Seraphine, I thought.

I watched all of the life flow out of his eyes as the joy was ripped out of him.

“I’m sorry, Ethan. But… I told you. I have a new life here. You should go.”

I was saying the words, but it was breaking my heart to do it.

“If you’ll just give me a little more time, Rosalie– ”

“I gave you time, Ethan.” I shook my head. “I don’t need more time to know that you didn’t appreciate me before, and you won’t now. So… go. Leave the island. It’s better this way. For all of us.” I placed my hands on my stomach so he would know I meant for the baby, too.

He took a deep breath and then blew it out slowly. “You’re right, Rosalie. I should have left already.”

He paused, and said, “But I couldn’t.”

“Why not?!”

I was exasperated that he wouldn’t just go and promise to never come back. Was he going to take his word back and hurt me? How could he?

But… when I looked into his eyes, all I saw was unrest.

He was such a proud man, but it was as if he was pleading with me. It was beginning to break my heart.

Ethan stared at the ground between his boots for a moment before he looked up to me.

“I always thought I was strong enough to control everything, Rosalie. I just say a word, and others leap into action. But you made me realize there is one thing I cannot control.”

I swallowed hard, my eyes locked on his, the distance between us seeming to narrow. With my bottom lip beginning to tremble, I asked, “What’s that, Ethan?”

“My own heart.”