Stealing the Heart of Mr. Steele

[Atlas]

The day after Angelica told Cordelia our "news" I tried to visit Cordelia, but I was shooed away by Clark. He told me about their agreement, and when I expressed my anger, he shut me down hard.

"You have Angelica, remember," he reminded me. "Wasn't she the one you wanted in the first place? Until Angelica has her memories back, maybe you should leave Cordelia to my care. She doesn't need to see you two together. It is already breaking her heart." So I left her with Clark and headed home.

But that doesn't mean I've forgotten about her. If anything, I can't get Cordelia out of my mind. The memory of her kisses haunts me.

Especially now that Angelica is living in my house, eating meals with me, and sleeping in the room down the hall. For someone I used to get along with so well, it seems that we have nothing real to talk about. She goes on and on about flower arrangements and gowns for a wedding that should not and will not happen, and I just nod my head and keep quiet, planning my next moments away from her.

All these years I have been thinking about her, dreaming about her, and now that she is here, now that she is real I find myself wishing she was someone else. Ironically enough, the person I want is her sister, Cordelia. At least when I argue with her, the arguments have some basis in reality.

It seems that I am doomed to keep on wanting the one I cannot have.

"But you can have Cordelia in your life," I mumble to myself as I get ready this morning, shaving the last of my stubble. "It's not like she's dead or gone or disappeared. She is in the hospital across town and if I get there soon enough, I can be there when she is released." As soon as I leave my bathroom, Angelica is waiting for me, sitting at the foot of my bed. She was so quiet entering my room, I almost thought I was looking at a ghost.

"What are you doing in my room?"

"Shouldn't this be our room now," she smiles shyly. "I mean, we'll be married soon and it's not like I'm a virgin," she takes a step towards me and I back away.

"We've gone over this, Angelica. I'm waiting until the wedding. It wouldn't feel right to me before then," I give her the same argument I've given her since she moved in with me. I do not want to betray Cordelia with her sister.

Angelica places a hand softly on my shoulder. "I won't rush you," she smiles softly, "but I do hope you change your mind soon. I feel like I haven't seen you in forever."

"Really?" I ask maybe a bit too eagerly, hoping that she may be remembering something. "Like you haven't seen me in 5 years or..."

Her eyes look lost. "Atlas, you're confusing me. I've never been gone, I've always been here. Right? RIGHT?!"

As she begins to panic, I place a hand on each shoulder, as I try to bring her focus back to my face. "Of course, Angelica. I didn't mean anything. I was just trying to get a sense of how you are feeling."From NôvelDrama.Org.

Her eyes regain their focus and her breathing begins to slow as the same simple smile crosses her face." Silly me," she kisses me lightly as I fight not to flinch. "forgot something I wanted to show you in my room. If you'd follow me...?

"I'm on my way to work," I lie not wanting her to know am off to pick her sister up from the hospital and take her home. "I'll have to see it when I get back."

"Will you be home for dinner?" she looks so domestic, standing there in her pretty floral sundress. The perfect CEO's wife. Not a single hair was out of place, her blond hair gleaming in the sun.

This was what I wanted, right?

"I'll let you know if I plan to be late," I promise, giving her a brotherly peck on the cheek. "Don't wait

me."

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If things go well, maybe I won't make it home tonight. Maybe Cordelia will let me stay with her, at least to keep her company on her first night home. I want to tell her about all the plans I've been making since she disappeared, all the adventures I hope we can have together as we get to know one another.

Most importantly, I want to tell her that I love her. I've loved her for a long time but was just too stupid to realize it.

A cheerful song comes to mind and I find myself humming all the way to the hospital. But when I arrive in the lobby, I am told that she has already been released, and taken home by her fiance.

It seems that Clark has beaten me to it.

I drive over to her apartment. Looking up at the top floor, I see Clark, Tilly, and Cordelia gathered around toasting with glasses of sparkling apple cider. I try knocking on the door, but nobody answers. I do not have a key, so I cannot let myself in.

I send a text to Cordelia, but it bounces back. Apparently, her phone had been disconnected when she wasn't home to pay the bill.

So I text Tilly, but she doesn't respond. I sent her a second text asking her to have Cordelia call me back at any time if she needed something.

I send a text to Clark. He responds quickly.

""She's fine. I'll make sure of it."

My heart sinks.

I leave my business card wedged in her door, hoping she'll see it and know I was here. On the back, I place the drawing of a heart. Not quite the confession I was hoping to make, but for now it will have to do. "Please tell her I was here," I text Clark one more time "And that I'll visit again soon."

"Don't," is all he replied. "You'll just hurt her."

I stare at my phone for several minutes before closing it and driving to work.

I'm not ready to give up on her yet. But maybe, she's already given up on me.

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